O Woman, You Rily Being!

Vivacious and undeterred, ambitious and bold to the fault. Yes, we are rily women!

We are the half of us, mothers, sisters, daughters, wives, friends, business women, working women, housewives, and in every role you can label. With every tag you give us, we grow and come out stronger; even if it is a nasty label! We are the women of today. We are the rily beings.

We, the rily women, the storm-bringers and the typhoon chasers, sing as we stroll through the whirlwinds. Nothing can stop us from reaching where we want to be! We will work it out, one way or the other. Through the thunders and the rains, betrayals and injustice, whatever you put in our way.

We are the caretakers of the world, we can wash the dirt you throw at us. We can wash you out too, like a baby in our arms. Wail and cry, do what you want! We are the pillars you build legacies on. We are, ultimately, the ones shaping them all! We are the rily beings who heal your fears and cast away shadows and tears. You will come back to us after the long day ends, whoever you are.

We are the rily beings who shake things up, who look at the colourful future, who take the long path home to see the sunset on the way, who nature created to make this world a beautiful place!

Imagine, if you stopped throwing stones at us, stopped blocking our paths and darkening our days? What if you accepted our fluid hearts and free souls, strong emotions and feminine grace?
We’d have more time to make the future better, to make the world an even more beautiful place!

We, the rily women, are making the future and building bridges, going places no one thought we would, doing things you thought were crazy for a woman to do. But that is what we have been doing since the beginning of the time; evolution is nothing but feminine! You were just blinded by the curtain of ego, disbelief and pride. But have you not heard, it is love that makes you blind?

Love is a lady, beautiful and sublime, a flower that blossoms even in a winter’s night. Maybe you forget time to time, but it is also for us, for who you make a life!

It is ok, now, for the rily women who chase the storms will bring winds to tear the curtains down. Peek out of the darkness, it’s once again the break of dawn!

We, the rily women, are the winds and the waves; dancing, crashing, and carving our ways! We are the force existing from the start of life, always moving the world and shaping today.

Originally published in: TOI Blogs, Perspicere

Someone Like You

You, who were the sunlight of my life in the darkest times,

Giving me warmth from the bright twinkles in your eyes and your hearty smiles!

You, who’s embrace melted my walled core and fears,

You, even someone like you has weaker sides.

You reminded me that the Sun sets and it’s night even after the brightest summer morning,

You reminded me that memories of such melting comforts can be crushing.

You, someone like you, can make and break,

And be someone else’s sun from the next day.

Forget yesterday, forget the summer’s sweet days!

You, someone like you is a boon and a curse,

Flipping someone like me between fire and ice,

You, someone like you is the one I thank and wish to forget in a single prayer,

Some haunting that makes me smile, some bliss that gives me a scare…

You, someone like you, I’m blessed to have met but will never want to meet again,

It’s someone like you that makes a fool wise,

Someone like you I pray I find and keep this time,

As my own Sun without any nights…

And someone like you, you know, will never find,

The Moon’s calming silver light to liven up your soul,

For there’s only one Moon that brings tides!

So, someone like you may be the centre of another’s universe,

But someone like you will never me mine.

Someone like me will revel in the soothing silvery nights,

Hoping for a Sun that always gives the Moon it’s light,

No eclipse,

Only the moon Playing with the sea and forests and all that’s wild,

Spreading a beautiful silver after the moonrise.

Infrastructure vs The Basic Structure: How The Big and The Small Things are Connected?

     In the latest joint-parliamentary meeting, the Hon. President of India clearly stated the blueprint of the new government. It is a laudable to-do list! They have covered the much needed points, especially about the Infrastructure, corruption, and black money.  Infrastructure is an indispensable part of an economy, and India is leagues behind from its contemporary rivals China, Brazil, Taiwan, and South Africa. Corruption is the grass-root level of decay in India, so yes, it has to be weeded out of the system. Black money again is a big problem. It must be brought back in circulation and steps should be strictly taken against it in future. There are many more big problems like brain drain, illegal immigration, a moldy education system, messy town planning ( I think it should be a whole different department), environmental degradation, e-governance, etc.

     But what about the small problems? What about the problems that we see every day and have grown so used to that we have learned to live with them? What about the problems that have direct effect on our peace of mind? Let me jot down examples to remind you.

     If you are in Mumbai, you know about how dirty the railway terminals are. You would know about the nallas, the slums, Juhu beach loaded with filth, to point out a few. These are supposed to be grand and sparkling as they are in the Financial Capital and Bollywood centre of India, where thousands of people gather every day, including tourists. What does it do to our thought process? No amount hit movies or tall buildings can fix this image.

     Delhi- ites know what a black and white city Delhi is, with clean and neat metros and roads in contrast with jammed and crammed, stinking market places and localities. The old and the New Delhi are two different worlds. So are CP and areas like Kamla market. What does it makes people who see the mess everyday think? No number of metro rails or even bullet trains can reduce this difference.

     Bhopal, my very own city, could be an international favorite only if the town plan wasn’t messy, if BRTS was introduced AFTER widening the roads (possible only and only with a good town planning!), if the areas around the lakes, dams and heritage sites could be built in a modern standard and saved from encroachment, if only people didn’t throw garbage wherever they wanted… No amount of building malls will correct the tainted scenery.

     You begin to think- this mess is the reality, and that’s how it’s going to be. Deal with it, or migrate to a foreign land.

     TO ALL INDIANS. You know how many throw garbage out of the train. Simply because there is no dustbin in the coach. Why can’t we complain, or collect the mess in a bag and keep it in a corner?

     You know how many spit and dirty public places even if there are dustbins.

     You know how you ignore complaining to the authorities when public toilets, places are not clean. That’s because the authorities don’t care, I agree.

     But can this cycle of ignorance and blame game continue? It’s like a wheel in zero gravity; spinning without moving forward, eternally in one place.

     The development in Infrastructure, manufacturing industry, and in every other sector will mean NOTHING if the walls are covered in pan spit and garbage, and if the toilets stink. Can you imagine entering a world-class railway terminal with stained walls and garbage all around, with no proper services? Zero corruption level will not help if people don’t wake up and realize that clean and beautiful cities are their RIGHT and they should demand it. Visuals have a deep affect on a human’s psychology. What you see is what you believe in. You see garbage, you believe that that is the reality. Ignorance settles in, but subconsciously you want out. This leads to unsatisfied and frustrated citizens. No amount of increase in GDP and PPP will satisfy these frustrated masses. If they don’t see the development, how will they believe in it?

               So what can Policy- makers do?

     With a new enthusiasm and energy, they can set a special department or team for reaching the roots of this mess. It starts from the higher ups in bureaucracy. Give them targets, give them incentives, give them strict instructions to keep a check. TRAIN them as per the modern needs and international standards. As you go lower, give the workers, cleaners and other people doing odd jobs training and equipment. Make their work respectable!Good administration and effective communication is very important here. What happens is, that people with seemingly insignificant jobs like cleaning, sitting on counters, making rounds to check on others, labour jobs, etc. are not educated, trained, informed, or equipped. Even if they know what to do, no one checks if they are doing their jobs right (For an example, the general and sleeper coaches in a train is a mess. Let’s not even bring up the toilets!) As people already have no expectations, there is no strict action. The cycle thus again goes to the higher ups.

     I propose that at least half the jobs regarding administration, implementation and grievances/ complaints should be given to management students. The lack of training and proper standards for government jobs recruitment at railways, ticket counters, public hospitals, various registration centers should be corrected. Proper checks must be ensured, and their performance measured. Complaints should be quickly handled.

     Cleanliness, government and citizen communication, quick solutions to the problem are the basic structure of growth besides trade and economy. The newer cities should be planned with future in prospects in mind to avoid repetitions of  the present problems. These are the little services that make a ‘beautiful’ economy. The policy makers should introduce reforms and policies, to make what already exists, better!

             What should citizens do?

     AWAKE!! Realize that the higher standards of life can be reached for the rich and the poor alike if public areas are clean and beautiful! It is your right! The standard of living rises with better hygiene, more happiness, and communication with a government that responds and helps. A beautiful house can give you peace only until you stay in. But once you step out to work or just for a stroll, it depends on your surroundings to either frustrate or invigorate. Promote environment friendly culture, use bicycles whenever possible, stop treating your cities and towns like garbage cans or washbasins or toilets, be an active citizen! If every person keeps his area of the town clean, if every municipality does its work like it should be, the day isn’t far when we will ‘feel’ India becoming a superpower instead of just reading about it in newspapers. Society is another name for tolerance, patience, and unity combined. It can either strive to move forward or starve and die.

     I am going to start an awareness revolution by questioning the authorities and telling them about what I see wrong. I will take advantage of the newly formed government’s energy, and help them it in reaching the bigger goals through small steps. It won’t matter if I’m in Bhopal or outside.  I will do my part. Will you?

Worry Makes You Fail… Almost Always!

969238_621572787873568_1413897366_n     Haven’t you constantly worried about something? Don’t u constantly worry about something? And aren’t most of those things about a future that may or may not happen? In the present world and lifestyle, you cannot avoid worrying.

    Worries are thoughts. You are thinking about alternative results you may get, and the problem with us is that we create mostly the negative ones in our minds. Such negative imagination of consequences or happenings will not help you improve anything; you are only deteriorating your chances of success! Most of the time, these negative thoughts have an adverse impact. You become gloomy, fearful. And an up shooting BP is no good for health, is it?

     Worrying can be constructive, however, if it doesn’t come wrapped in negativity. A worry focused on finding the SOLUTION, not visualizing the problem and its ILL CONSEQUENCES become constructive. It may actually calm your nerves!

     For example, I have an exam soon. If I imagine that the questions would be out of my range of solving, its gonna be impossible to score well, I’m gonna fail, etc, then I’d be depressed. I’d give up before trying, at least somewhere in my subconscious. I wouldn’t give my hundred percent, and probably score less. BUT if I instead worry like this- the exam might be tough, I gotta start studying hard right now- the chances are that I would score better than ever. I would be confident more than nervous.

It’s all in your mind. The key to avoiding a negative scenario is to focus on the solution to the problem. Don’t go on thinking the worst and even adding the alternative ways for the worst to happen. If my little bro has not been home from his classes, he might be out his friends. The chances of being kidnapped, attacked, hurt, getting into an accident, lost, or something worst is almost zero. What I may do to stop negatively worrying about him is to give him a cell phone and be in contact!

     Depression, paranoia, anxiety, panic, negativity.. they are not good for a clear mind. Without clarity, there’s no success. Without success, there’s no happiness! Some most laid-back, cool people do the same. Successful businessmen, and other people good at their jobs which looks stressful to us have learnt to work with worries while not allowing the darkness to set in their hearts (my personal example is my dad!). Look around for such people and study them!

     Quit worrying destructively and worry constructively, for in the making- or breaking- is YOU!

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